In February 2004, I moved into my dream house. It was designed with my help and custom built for me. Pretty good for a single mom, I thought. A friend said "this is your time." During this time I had prayed from something to help bring me closer to God. I thought perhaps I'd attend a revival or concert. In March 2004, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Dr David Sechler gave me the news. We never really know what we'll do until we are confronted. He gave me the option of lumpectomy and radiation or mastectomy. I asked him if he loved his wife and he answered that he did. Next, I asked him what he'd want for her. He said lumpectomy and radiation. I said OK, let's do it. No tears. Just all business. We all handle things differently. That day I went to his office, I figured we'd just be talking about my lumpy, yet benign breasts. I'd never had a normal mammo. Giving my teenage daughter the news was hard. Then the tears came.
Good Friday 2004, I had a lumpectomy. A few weeks later, I began radiation. Now, I had been divorced for several years and always thought "what do I need a man for?" Nothing. Well, when you are lying on that table all alone getting treatments, you think. When you have cancer you re-order and re-prioritize your life. I thought "Oh Lord, how many people before me have been on this table who are no longer with us?" I began to think "well maybe it would be nice to have someone to come home to..." I joined a computer dating service while still getting radiation treatments. This spring I was married.
I did grow closer to God. It really was my time, after all. Truly, the strong survive and the adaptable thrive. I have always had hope. I have been among other things raped, beaten, homeless, and jobless... but I have never and will never give up hope. Never, ever give up.
I hope this helps to strengthen and inspire others, in much the same way that my life has benefited my daughter. I have taught many things with my mouth but that learned through example is learned well.
God Bless you and Bless Women Supporting Women. Thanks for all you've done.
Written by Kathy Ferrare for our August 2005 Newsletter. |
